Guilt

I've struggled intensely with false guilt, shame, and self-condemnation since I can remember. I don't think "intensely" is a strong enough word. These sins have been so deeply entrenched in me that they caused an auto-immune disease which I'm still trusting God to deliver me from. My body literally eats itself. I've lost a foot an a half of intestine so far. My guilt has been particularly bad these past few days. Hence, I've been feeling terrible. (By the way.. the disease is caused by other things that I'm currently getting freedom from, as well). ANYHOW, I've been searching for God's help all day, and He gave me: 

how much more shall the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered Himself without spot to God, cleanse your conscience from dead works to serve the living God? Hebrews 9:14

For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ2 Corinthians 10:4-5

 I realized that I haven't been receiving His forgiveness. His blood. As ridiculous as it sounds to me, my heart has been housing areas of pride.. as in, "Jesus, I don't need your blood because I can self-medicate my guilt by soaking in Your presence whenever it starts to get really bad." My solution doesn't sound like a bad thing at all - except I was smacking a band-aid on a huge pussy infected wound. I wasn't going to the root - I was just treating the symptoms. I was resting in my own fleshy efforts to rid myself of guilt rather than letting His mighty blood come in and pull down this stronghold.

I'm not really sure why I'm sharing. Maybe someone on here needs help in dealing with guilt. I'll end with a quote that speaks to me time and time again.

"There is no place to hide but in the blood of the Lamb." AW Tozer