List

a friend's post urged me to sit down and think about the things that i want in a husband. it's hard for me to make a list because i am personally trying not to put any expectations on him. my expectations need to be in the Creator, not the created. i've struggled in the past with trusting God fully with whoever He's giving me, and it has taken a lot of death for me to lay down different things that i desire in a spouse.

if i had to make a list, though, these would be included. i might even add things later. this is more for me to remember and look back on rather than for other people to read, but i don't mind if you DO read :) i can feel confident in putting these following qualities on my list because i'm sure of God's calling on my life in these areas, and my husband's calling must align with mine. also, most of these are qualities that Jesus possessed. therefore, i don't really feel concerned that i'm putting ungodly expectations on him.

1) radical laid-down lover of Jesus
2) financially secure
3) disciplined with his body (eating, exercise, etc. this IS biblical)
4) healed from sexual immorality
5) healed from parent wounds
6) a passion for the fatherless and the oppressed
7) disciplined in the spiritual disciplines (prayer, fasting, titheing, etc)
8) a deep revelation of the fullness of the Father's love
9) Spirit-filled - baptized in the Spirit
10) confident in his ability to hear the voice of God
11) a passion for loving the unlovely and the perpetrator
12) a passion to be a father (physical and spiritual)
13) a passion for justice that is balanced with a mercy-heart
14) a contageous, consistent joy
15) ability to shift the spiritual atmosphere
16) secure in his identity in Christ
17) confident in his authority as a man of God
18) carrier of peace and is a peacemaker
19) exudes patience, kindness, gentleness, and compassion
20) practices power under control (meekness)
21) faithful as a son of God and as a husband and father
22) lives a lifestyle of worship
23) practices self-control over his mind, will, emotions, and flesh
24) yields to the Spirit
25) posesses the abililty to give and receive freely
26) embraces grace
27) embraces humility
28) appreciates and seeks truth and beauty
29) firey warrior for God
30) actively pursuing a love relationship with Jesus
31) receives correction and discipline well and is under authority's covering
32) possesses a spirit of thankfulness
33) possesses control of his tongue and his words
34) walks in honesty and integrity - is a man of his word
35) has vision and God-sized dreams and actively pursues them
36) freely gives and receives forgiveness
37) carries the fear of the Lord and godly repentence
38) lives a lifestyle of honor
39) loves clarity and communcation
40) a passion for protecting life
41) has an eternal mindset - stores up his treasure in heaven

i've only spent about 30 minutes thinking about this. i also really hope he's artistic and musical, but i'm leaving that in God's hands. i don't expect him to be perfect in all of these, but i do expect him to be growing in all of them. i don't feel like that's an ungodly expectation :)