1 Kings 19

I once heard Corey Russell teach on the prophets of today being trapped in their prison caves of shame. I thought I had an idea.. I had no clue.

In this passage, God needs Elijah (arguably) more than ever.. yet Elijah, fearing Jezebel and faced with the reality of a lack of revival in the land, runs and hides in a cave.

ELIJAH. the same Elijah who stood boldly before Ahab and declared a three year drought over the land. who was fed by ravens of God's divine provision. who provided a widow with a miraculous food supply in the middle of a famine. who raised the widow's son. who called down fire from heaven. who prayed until rain clouds appeared. who outran Ahab back to Jezreel.

this same Elijah, filled with fear and despair, ran and hid in a cave upon hearing that Jezebel was seeking to kill him. HOW? how did this mighty man of God become such a "failure"?

i believe that a large part of why Elijah got to the point of hiding in a cave is that he lost his focus. he lost sight of God, and pride snuck in.. and then his expectations were shattered. things weren't going how he had imagined them to go (neglecting God's timing and sovereignty), so Elijah, ashamed, went and hid in a place of human refuge rather than turning to The Ultimate Refuge.

i can't help but see the parallels in my life. on March 19th, i was commissed by God as a prophetess. on March 27th, God laid it on my heart to really go after the spirit of Jezebel (not that i haven't been going after her for almost a year now.. but it was a fresh passion). i went about it in my own way, rather than seeking God's heart on what to do. two days later, she came after ME. what did i do? i retreated into my cave of shame.

while in my cave, God also started showing me areas of unrelated shame that i have carried around since my childhood. His pure intent was to deal with the pain and free me, but i got scared and neglected to trust Him.. and so satan took that opportunity and wormed his way into that pain.. and the pain grew and festered until it was out of my control.


basically this past week was CRAZY. i was being demonically tormented (i'm not using that term loosely) from monday to saturday afternoon.. it got to the point where my best friend, as an intercessor, was also being tormented on my behalf. i was thinking things and doing things and feeling things that i haven't felt since before i rededicated my life to Christ. it got to the point where i was deadened to God.


my favorite part about this story is that God completely restored Elijah and brought him back into his ministry, stronger than ever. God broke in and did this for me yesterday. i've never been more grateful.


i thought it was fitting for Resurrection Sunday. i was going to post a blog related to Easter.. but in a way, i just wanted to share how God "resurrected" me this weekend, just as He restored Elijah.


He is good. praise Him. He is worthy of it :)